‘SNL’ Cold Open: Pete Hegseth Has Some Terrible Advice for Trapped Oil Tankers

Saturday Night Live ‘s Pete Hegseth has a solution for oil tankers stuck in the Strait of Hormuz by the threat of Iranian mines: do what he used to do at DUI checkpoints. “The news is: we won! Hashtag ‘winning!’ So you can stop asking me all about it. Don’t even worry about it ,” he said. “The real problem is all you gaybies—gay babies, copyright—all you gaybies in the media are completely unpatriotic, okay?

They’re using what I do and say to make me look like a fool!” After Iran shut it down, causing oil and gas prices to spike, Trump told oil tankers to just “show some guts”—despite the mines. And SNL ‘s Hegseth was on the same page. “If you’re an oil tanker, and you’re driving it, and you see one of those mines, do what I do at a DUI checkpoint: close your eyes and gun it!” instructed Hegseth.